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Tuesday, 5 March 2013
With God's help @ 12:51

I'm sorry i really miss you right now. Lately has been so empty and hollow for me. I've been crying and really, i just miss you. Ain't easy to be me. I love a guy who isn't mine. How you've been? i hope you're happy and doing just fine with life.

I'm just having my moments. Where i lay in my bed, turn my speaker on and think about love that we used to have and weep like a fragile girl i am. God, i just hate those moments.

The girl who stole your heart must be very cute. You probably think of her every night, thinking of how to get her to be yours, how to make her love you. I dont mind. Its the circle of life. its supposed to happen. Im just bother how fast its happening. How do you move on so fast? Dont you think of me when you think of her? Youre not supposed to be like that. Maybe its just another side of you that i didnt know.

Maybe its true and I have to accept the fact that teen love isn't going to last longer. I think its supposed to last but its not. Its not. I want to feel wanted, worthy and loveed. I just need someone cause im nothing than another lonely motherfucker.

I feel like a jerk for comparing myself with that cute girl. I hate myself for that. I shouldn't have done that, i'm an inconsiderate bitch man. Oh god, forgive me. I will never try to move on or forget about you. Its such a waste of energy cause i know nothing will ever mend my broken heart and i have to live with that.

I should stop thinking that you still care. I should start thinking about my life. About my future. Its not about who im going to be with. Its about what my future to be like, my studies..its just the matter of life. I have to make my parents proud of me. I want to be a successful woman that act like a girl but think like a lady. Im trying so hard to be successful in life. But still not forget of my duty as a muslim. O' Allah, i hope you give me the strenght to get through and passing by each day. Amin' Ya Rabbal Alamin.

Le madame

Nurfarina // 19 years young // Malaysia